实战演练
假如你是李华,你校英语广播站正在征集稿件,请你以“My hometown”为题写一篇短文,向大家介绍你的家乡——徐州。
【内容包括】1. 介绍一下你家乡的基本情况(地理位置、人口和著名景点等)。
2. 谈谈到达你家乡著名景点的方式及利弊(至少两种方式)。
3. 表达你对家乡的热爱。
【要求】1. 文中不能出现学校的真实名称和学生的真实姓名。
2. 语句连贯,词数80左右。作文的开头已经给出,不计入总词数。
My hometown
My hometown is Xuzhou,a historic city in northern Jiangsu Province.
It has a population of over 9 million and is famous for scenic spots like Yunlong Lake and Xuzhou Han Dynasty Tombs.
You can reach Yunlong Lake by bus or bike. Taking a bus is cheap and convenient, but it may be crowded during rush hours. Riding a bike lets you enjoy the street views along the way, yet it's tiring for long distances.
I'm proud of my hometown's long history and beautiful scenery. I love it deeply and hope more people can visit here.
答案:My hometown
My hometown is Xuzhou, a historic city in northern Jiangsu Province. It has a population of over 9 million and is famous for scenic spots like Yunlong Lake and Xuzhou Han Dynasty Tombs.
You can reach Yunlong Lake by bus or bike. Taking a bus is cheap and convenient, but it may be crowded during rush hours. Riding a bike lets you enjoy the street views along the way, yet it's tiring for long distances.
I'm proud of my hometown's long history and beautiful scenery. I love it deeply and hope more people can visit here.
解析:
【分析】
首先拿到这道写作题,先明确三个必须覆盖的内容要点,第一步先承接题目已经给出的开头,补充家乡徐州的基础信息:对应第一个要点,补充人口数量、当地知名景点,内容要符合徐州的实际情况。第二步对应第二个要点,选择其中一个知名景点,挑选两种常见的抵达方式,分别清晰写出每种方式的优势和弊端,保证至少两种方式的利弊都表述完整。第三步对应第三个要点,自然抒发自己对家乡的喜爱与自豪感,最后注意控制总词数在80左右,不要出现任何真实的校名、人名,保证语句连贯通顺。
【解析】
1. 承接给定开头,先补充家乡基础信息:点明徐州人口超过900万,列举云龙湖、徐州汉墓等当地标志性景点,完成第一个内容要点的书写。
2. 选取云龙湖作为介绍的景点,列出公交、骑行两种抵达方式:说明坐公交的优势是便宜便捷,弊端是高峰时段会拥挤;骑行的优势是可以沿途观赏街景,弊端是长距离骑行会劳累,完整覆盖第二个要点的两种方式及利弊要求。
3. 最后收尾,表达自己为家乡的悠久历史和美景感到自豪,抒发对家乡的热爱,同时发出欢迎大家来游玩的期许,完成第三个情感表达的要点,整体衔接自然,词数符合要求,没有出现违规的真实个人、学校信息。
【答案】
My hometown
My hometown is Xuzhou, a historic city in northern Jiangsu Province. It has a population of over 9 million and is famous for scenic spots like Yunlong Lake and Xuzhou Han Dynasty Tombs.
You can reach Yunlong Lake by bus or bike. Taking a bus is cheap and convenient, but it may be crowded during rush hours. Riding a bike lets you enjoy the street views along the way, yet it's tiring for long distances.
I'm proud of my hometown's long history and beautiful scenery. I love it deeply and hope more people can visit here.
【知识点】
家乡主题写作,出行利弊表达,英语短文谋篇
【点评】
本篇范文完全覆盖题干要求的全部三个内容要点,内容贴合徐州本地实际情况,两种出行方式的利弊描述逻辑清晰,情感表达真挚自然,全文语句连贯无语法错误,词数符合80左右的要求,没有出现违规的真实信息,是一篇非常规范的介绍类说明文范文,学生可以参考它的结构搭建方式,学习如何把给定的要点自然串联成通顺的短文。
【难度系数】
0.7